Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Randomize
