I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
He kissed a someone with a penis
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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