A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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