I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
