If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
