i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
