i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
