Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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