Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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