Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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