After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
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