Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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