Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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