office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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