It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
