Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
