i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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