friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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