pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
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