We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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