I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
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