It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I need to calm my uterus...
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
