Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I could fuck to npr.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
