I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
They are going to name an STD after you.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Randomize
