I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
