If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
