I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
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