I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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