you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Randomize
