I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Randomize
