I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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