I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
You're a waste of cheezeits
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
