If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
