I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
