Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
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