...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
you inspire me to be a worse person
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Randomize
