# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize