My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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