what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
