i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
