she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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