hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Randomize
