no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
