talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
