Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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