Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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