maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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