Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
