I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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