1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
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