I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
love makes seman taste better
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
